oh freedom. i want you when you're not around but when you're around i want to hide.
you with your choices and your wild wide open horizon:
i can't think with all your endless space and acceptance.
judge me! assail my choices! i beg you: force me into a corner, any corner, so long as i am cramped and unable to move.
stillness, that's the stuff. peace and quiet, please. i want to curl up in the darkness of your absence, left alone to suffer stiffly whatever it is i am told to suffer.
i'm tired. we're already cursed, don't you know? it's too late, has always been too late, will always be too late.
so go. or stay, so i can rail against you. or go, and i can be glad you're gone. or stay. i don't care. unless i do. wait, maybe i do. is it too late? you decide.
you decide. you decide. i can't decide for you. you decide for me. i'm free! unless you say i'm not. does it matter?
i'm free, aren't i, to wonder.