David Lehman

The Trip Not Taken 
 
It was in Cambridge in 1970 or 1971 that I went to a lecture
by George Steiner,
an energetic man, short and stout,
with an international accent of indeterminate origin.
It was standing room only.
My friends and I stood in the back.
The subject was language and silence
or maybe language versus silence.
Language won.
 
Steiner praised the American students in Cambridge --
sharper, more daring than the English.
We beamed idiotically.
One of us raised his hand and said something
meant to prove Steiner's point.
He used the words "conceptualize" and "anarchic"
in the same sentence.
 
My mind was where?
In the girls' dormitory.
Listen to my story.
Nothing could be finer
than to be in her vagina
after listening to George Steiner
at the anarchic heart
of our culture.
Is the heart anarchic?
 
Nothing could be finer 
than to walk among the amber
streetlamps of Cambrdge
after the lecture
and visit my friend's sister
who brought blotter acid with her
from America
and what we did 
we did without supervision
and we didn't own a television
but we owed ourselves a vision
and we had it in front of a store
with women's sweaters in the window
not on King's Parade but the next street over.
 
I have to tell you: Steiner was brilliant.
And we had the experience 
even if we did miss the meaning:
ruin and consolation, desire and
annulment. We took
the trip.

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